Heart lessons for me....
Psalm 127:3-5 Behold children are a gift of the Lord; The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They shall not be ashamed, When they speak with their enemies in the gate.
I decided to post this because,
I have noticed, in my life, that I have about 4 close friends that I know of who are struggling BIG TIME with parenting lately. And, I have been having a REALLY rough time with my parenting lately. I have had a very hard time controlling my anger and I am to the point right now that I am just desperate. I don't know why I am so easily provoked. I have decided to stop spanking and even touching when I am angry. I will go to the next room and calm down and pray and then I will try to talk calmly and gently to my child. I will explain in the calmest way possible. My wonderful friend, Sarah, gave some great scriptures on her blog that I am going to use to try to explain and talk to Claire, especially, about why her behavior is not pleasing in God's eyes.
All to often I find myself "MAD" at her. Yes, MAD. Mad in the sense that I am NOT going to let her get the best of me!! I am not going to let a 4 yr. old treat me like that and push me that far!! I don't know why I feel this way and don't get me wrong, we LOVE OUR CHILDREN DEARLY and would NEVER abuse them but.....
it could lead to that and that would be a terrible thing.I have done a lot of praying and crying in the past week and I feel like God is going to lead us through this. So, I want to ask for your prayers and I want to explain what I feel God is saying in these verses (related to my parenting!)
If you can use any of this, GREAT!! I hope someone can read this and relate and use what I am being taught in their own life/parenting situation.
In this verse:
Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
I have a problem lately of being so angry that I say whatever comes into my mind. I actually keep asking Claire & Lily "WHY???" why did you do that? what's wrong with you? why are you causing me so much trouble? why can't you just leave it alone? why aren't you listening to me?////etc.....
Actually, by doing this, I am telling them (in their little minds) that they are worthless. They are troublemakers. They are annoying me. Then they begin to believe these lies. Because I didn't control my mouth. .Because I let unwholesome talk come out of my mouth. I did not build them up, I knocked them down. And, that breaks my heart. That is what hurts most of all. I have caused my children to doubt whether they are good. When they are good. Mama's the one who can't control her mouth.
So, that's the HEART LESSON I am learning there.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient, Love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
Okay, here, I learned from Sarah to replace Love with my name (Julie) so it would read:
"Julie is patient, and is not jealous. Julie does not brag and is not arrogant. Julie does not act unbecomingly; Julie does not seek her own . Julie is not provoked. Julie does not take into account a wrong suffered. Julie does not rejoice in unrighteousness. Julie rejoices with the truth. Julie bears all things. Julie believes all things. Julie hopes all things. Julie endures all things. Julie never fails.
The point is that I am supposed to be as love is. I am supposed to love unconditionally. I am supposed to be patient and kind and long suffering and not be provoked. I am not supposed to hold onto wrongs that are done to me. I am not supposed to fail my children. I am supposed to love them in any circumstance. At least that is what I am reading here.
and finally, the last verse I have to share with you:
Psalm 127:3-5 Behold children are a gift of the Lord; The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They shall not be ashamed, When they speak with their enemies in the gate.
I believe that just speaks for itself. Do I see my children as a reward from GOD almighty? Do I treat them as the reward they are? No, I should not spoil them but loving kindness is not spoiling; it's fertilizing their tender hearts to grow into children of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!
Okay, so I hope you understood and can benefit from all of this rambling! Please remember to keep me in your prayers. I posted this because I felt there was a need for people to be real about their struggles with parenting. I need prayers and encouragement with my parenting. I love my children more than I could ever say and I would die for them. I am sure that is true of all you parents who are reading this rambling post. So, if you are struggling with anger issues with your precious little ones, get help. If you can get it places like here and between you and Jesus, that's great!! If not,if that's just not what you need right now, if you need to go one step further, no one would blame you for seeking professional help. Sometimes, that is truly necessary. I will be praying. I know that there are those out there who need me to pray.
Much Love,
Julie
I decided to post this because,
I have noticed, in my life, that I have about 4 close friends that I know of who are struggling BIG TIME with parenting lately. And, I have been having a REALLY rough time with my parenting lately. I have had a very hard time controlling my anger and I am to the point right now that I am just desperate. I don't know why I am so easily provoked. I have decided to stop spanking and even touching when I am angry. I will go to the next room and calm down and pray and then I will try to talk calmly and gently to my child. I will explain in the calmest way possible. My wonderful friend, Sarah, gave some great scriptures on her blog that I am going to use to try to explain and talk to Claire, especially, about why her behavior is not pleasing in God's eyes.
All to often I find myself "MAD" at her. Yes, MAD. Mad in the sense that I am NOT going to let her get the best of me!! I am not going to let a 4 yr. old treat me like that and push me that far!! I don't know why I feel this way and don't get me wrong, we LOVE OUR CHILDREN DEARLY and would NEVER abuse them but.....
it could lead to that and that would be a terrible thing.I have done a lot of praying and crying in the past week and I feel like God is going to lead us through this. So, I want to ask for your prayers and I want to explain what I feel God is saying in these verses (related to my parenting!)
If you can use any of this, GREAT!! I hope someone can read this and relate and use what I am being taught in their own life/parenting situation.
In this verse:
Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
I have a problem lately of being so angry that I say whatever comes into my mind. I actually keep asking Claire & Lily "WHY???" why did you do that? what's wrong with you? why are you causing me so much trouble? why can't you just leave it alone? why aren't you listening to me?////etc.....
Actually, by doing this, I am telling them (in their little minds) that they are worthless. They are troublemakers. They are annoying me. Then they begin to believe these lies. Because I didn't control my mouth. .Because I let unwholesome talk come out of my mouth. I did not build them up, I knocked them down. And, that breaks my heart. That is what hurts most of all. I have caused my children to doubt whether they are good. When they are good. Mama's the one who can't control her mouth.
So, that's the HEART LESSON I am learning there.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 Love is patient, Love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
Okay, here, I learned from Sarah to replace Love with my name (Julie) so it would read:
"Julie is patient, and is not jealous. Julie does not brag and is not arrogant. Julie does not act unbecomingly; Julie does not seek her own . Julie is not provoked. Julie does not take into account a wrong suffered. Julie does not rejoice in unrighteousness. Julie rejoices with the truth. Julie bears all things. Julie believes all things. Julie hopes all things. Julie endures all things. Julie never fails.
The point is that I am supposed to be as love is. I am supposed to love unconditionally. I am supposed to be patient and kind and long suffering and not be provoked. I am not supposed to hold onto wrongs that are done to me. I am not supposed to fail my children. I am supposed to love them in any circumstance. At least that is what I am reading here.
and finally, the last verse I have to share with you:
Psalm 127:3-5 Behold children are a gift of the Lord; The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them; They shall not be ashamed, When they speak with their enemies in the gate.
I believe that just speaks for itself. Do I see my children as a reward from GOD almighty? Do I treat them as the reward they are? No, I should not spoil them but loving kindness is not spoiling; it's fertilizing their tender hearts to grow into children of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!
Okay, so I hope you understood and can benefit from all of this rambling! Please remember to keep me in your prayers. I posted this because I felt there was a need for people to be real about their struggles with parenting. I need prayers and encouragement with my parenting. I love my children more than I could ever say and I would die for them. I am sure that is true of all you parents who are reading this rambling post. So, if you are struggling with anger issues with your precious little ones, get help. If you can get it places like here and between you and Jesus, that's great!! If not,if that's just not what you need right now, if you need to go one step further, no one would blame you for seeking professional help. Sometimes, that is truly necessary. I will be praying. I know that there are those out there who need me to pray.
Much Love,
Julie
Labels: all my love, being real, searching, stress, the mommy, walking with Christ, word of God
posted by Jules at
3:09 PM
4 Comments:
Bless you dear, I will always pray for you, and your precious children. I love you.
I COMPLETELY see where you are coming from! I, too, have let my anger fume and erupt lately and have not applied appropriate scriptures to my parenting! I am praying for you and I hope you'll carry me as well!!
Oh hun, thanks for letting me know I'm not the only one going through this! It's sooo hard knowing how I WANT to be and then actually DOING it! It just don't know how to get a grip and calm down! BUT yesterday I dug up a bunch of verses on PEACE and it did help, a lot, so I posted them on my blog. And I've found then even when I don't spank Eli or yell at him, he knows he's being disciplined and I do think it's enough for him to learn to change his behavior. Can't wait for this new book to come that I ordered, because I need some help here! Ever wish it was your husband that decided how to parent your kids? I feel like I make ALL the decisions! Anyway, praying for ya!
Great post. I love when women/believers/ moms can be open & honest w/ one another. So many of us struggle w/ and have struggled with this issue. Great scriptures, also. LOVED the 'love' passage. Great idea. I pray for us homeschool, stay-at-home moms all the time. We need it! :-)
I've actually blogged about this issue a few times! I have some great book recommendations if you want them. And great work, mom. You're on the right track, seeking HIM, to please HIM, and Train your children. Most of all, leading by example! Blessings to you & your family!
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